2010

Originally, I had planned to go to the beach; Sam suggested that we give blood. I was bored and had nothing else to do, so I decided that it would be both a good use of time and a clever disguise of philanthropy.

I was surprised how many people had showed up to be siphoned out. My first thought was that if I was in a crash, this group of people would be the last I'd want blood from. They were saggy and overweight. If kissing is deemed to be intimate by sharing saliva, I'd hate to think of the degree of intimacy when blood is involved with these perishing donors. I quickly revised the illustration I'd conducted in my head; these weren't cows being milked, they were month old balloons feeling the prodding of a small child as they weakly deflated.

We had to fill out a bunch of questions; mostly to do with our promiscuity. I thought of an interesting test for the nurses; to dress flagrantly gay, take a small animal in a handbag, adopt a 'gay' voice and maintain your chastity. I thought it was quite blunt discrimination. After all, New Zealand women were recently found to be the most promiscuous in the world. Even if homosexuals have higher rates of HIV, it seems disproportionate that there wasn't a single question about any other sexual activity - I could be a slapper and they could care less.

After a brief iron test and another round of questions; 'Now, questions 1-10 concerning homosexual activity, could that possibly involve you?' I was set to go. We sat and waited while people in the centre of the room were siphoned off. Sam and I went in a pair ('Good luck babe xoxo.') The nurse jabbed me in the arm with a tube and the blood started trickling down. I sat there thinking how easily someone could bleed to death - I gave 450ml in 3 or 4 minutes and didn't feel anything. Carey took over 11 minutes and his flow stopped occasionally, he had numerous pains and the nurses were really quite worried (please don't file a suit.)

I'm off to Ryan Drew's tonight for a BBQ and some sweet hangouts. Should be some fun!
By the way, check out this sweet video that Nick sent me: